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From Obligation To Mythology, Our Lost Wedding Rituals

When a culture expands many things evolve and develop with it. Same is the case with Language and rituals, these both things also grow with the evolution of a social group, and it’s emergence from one community to another. But without going into depth, I will discuss the lost wedding rituals in South Asia which are now very different from their previous version. It seems like our old traditions are becoming a myth as these new trends are grooming and taking place of our old rituals.

Our Lost Wedding Rituals

The lost wedding rituals are not only those discontinued by the society but include all the ceremonies which are being transformed into something else by the community. These rituals are defined by the latest trends which mark the wedding functions. Now here are some of the lost wedding rituals and the new evolving trends which have taken the place of those rituals with the passing of time.


We all know that mayun was considered the most important custom for the bride in Asia. This was the event which was organized to show the community that the bride is going to get married after a week and usually this event was arranged a week before the marriage. In this event, all the close friends and family were invited, and only females were entertained. This event was specially dedicated to the bride who had to wear her yellow dress for one week without changing it till her mehndi.


Now this custom is celebrated as a necessary function, and guests, include both men and women- something  that this function didn’t mean years before.


New Trend Of Bridal Shower

The next big thing which is taking the place of Mayun is the Bridal Shower/ This is a typical western ritual, but now Asian brides are also adopting it. This ritual includes the friends and the females of the family which gather together and congratulated the bride. Now, this is a growing trend, and people consider it a must to celebrate-event.

Simple Mehndi Bride

Though I am no one to object on the intensity of makeup anyone wants to consume for looking what they want to be on their exceptional Mehndi function. Still, there is a conflict which revolves around my brain regarding the preparation of Mehndi. Bride of mehndi never dressed up and dolled up with the makeup in the previous decade. But now the bride gets proper mehndi bridal makeup and shines in the function with it!



Most of us know that previously there was not the concept of dance and the dance floors.

Dholak is an instrument just like the drum which was used by the females for singing the traditional wedding songs at mehndi in subcontinent.

But as the time evolved the dholak ceremony also included the dance preparations rather than the traditional songs. Recently coke studio also ruined one of the top hit mehndi songs, Ballay Ballay,  that was originally sung by Musarrat Nazir. Now the trend includes the development of a proper dance floor and dholak is no more a mandatory part of Mehndi function. Instead, the dholaki Function arranged separately is also for the dance preparation on Mehndi.


Barat Rituals

Now when we talk about Barat, there are many customs which are being transformed as a trend. “Joota Chupai” is a ritual in which all the brothers of the bride used to hide the shoe of the groom as he entered. It was the duty of the groom’s siblings to tackle this trap. But now as the groom comes to the hall, he hands over his shoe with the money which is already decided among both parties.

Doodh pilae was also a custom which was done by the sisters of the bride. In this ritual, there was a glass of milk which was presented by the girls to the groom, and he used to buy it with money. But now this ritual is performed in a very planned manner as, “Typical trend.”

Now the red dress is not at all a compulsion on Barat, and most of the brides choose other colors and prefer them over the traditional red color on their big day.


Flower Decor

Before I start a new debate, let me tell you very briefly that these marriage halls never existed in our culture before. The saloon makeup and the signature styled bride and groom with the matched flower decore. The Barat used to come at the doorstep of the bride which was decorated with flowers and of the designer flower decor but only the yellow and red flowers. Now, this tradition has been converted into a trend of designer flower decoration.


Why Are We Not Eradicating Dowry

Meanwhile, we are discussing so many changes and evolutionary reforms, why don’t we discuss the dowry too? Why don’t these lost wedding rituals include the dowry as well? Why are we still in an urge of demanding more and more from the bride’s family?

Do you know how many girls are not getting married just because they don’t have enough money to give dowry to the groom’s family?


Why are these norm still surrounding us and does not turn into a myth? In fact, dowry deserves to be called an illegal and punishable crime which is not only destroying the culture but the future of all those innocent girls, who are waiting for the prince charming with no demands, keeping a reality check in their mind that it’s never going to happen!

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